Proud of the stuff I’m made of

My grandmother passed away on April 14, 2012. I’m thankful that my mom was able to be with her for the last several weeks even though it was so hard on her. And I’m thankful that I was able to be there for most of that time too, even though it was so hard to be there for both of them.

I forgot that I started this post one night while I was lying in bed at my grandmother’s house. I started it on April 12. It’s time I finished it.

……………………………..

It’s hard to be here right now. In beautiful West Virginia. I’m here, but it’s hard. I know that my presence here is only because someone’s life is coming to a close.

Every now and then I just get so choked up and have to fight back the tears because I know, I know why I’m here. I’m here for moral support. And to do whatever I can for my grandma to make her more comfortable. And to do whatever I can for my mom to make her load a little lighter.

And it’s hard.

Selfishly I want to be home, lying in my own bed, chatting with my husband, and tending my flower and vegetable gardens. But I’m here. And this is ok too, just difficult.

My grandma has led a long, full life. She loves Jesus. And there’s going to be a party in heaven when she gets there. But she’s such a fighter. She’s so strong. I see those characteristics in my mom, and I see them in me. I’m proud of the line of people I come from on both sides of the family. They’re good people. Strong and true. We don’t give up easily and we’re loyal to the end.

……………………………..

There was a beautiful ceremony to remember my grandmother. My husband and dad flew up from Texas and my older brother came in from Canada to officiate. He did a wonderful job. She would have been so proud.

I think about my grandmother often. I’ve been avoiding working on the quilt that uses her fabric scraps, but I think it’s time I finished it and honored her. She was an incredible woman.

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